Why does this behaviour keep happening? Looking for patterns in behaviour

When someone’s behaviour feels unpredictable, it can be stressful, anxiety-inducing, and can leave you feeling constantly on edge.

The reality is that behaviour often follows patterns, even if those patterns are not obvious at first.

For example, a particular “trigger” may consistently lead to the same behaviour. For one person, moving between activities or places might trigger verbal aggression. In other situations, behaviour may follow a predictable “sequence,” for example, refusal escalating to verbal aggression, then to property damage, before the person eventually begins to de-escalate.

When we are in the middle of supporting complex behaviour, it can be difficult to notice these patterns. Carer stress and the focus on safety or de-escalation can make it harder to step back and see what is happening over time.

This is why it can be helpful to look at what happens before and after behaviour occurs.

Before the behaviour, we may start to notice patterns in triggers (what seems to set the behaviour off) or in context, such as where the person is, who they are with, or what they are doing at the time.

After the behaviour, we can look at what seems to help the situation settle again. This might include giving the person space, offering connection or reassurance, reducing demands, or changing the environment to make it less overwhelming.

It is important to remember that one incident on its own rarely tells the full story. Small differences in context, triggers, and responses can change what happens each time.

Understanding patterns in behaviour can help us respond in more supportive and proactive ways. For example, if we notice that Jimmy often swears when it is time to stop playing PlayStation and go to bed, we might reduce his distress by giving more preparation time, offering clear warnings, or allowing some negotiation around screen time and bedtime.

If you are trying to make sense of behaviour patterns over time, the Understanding Behaviour Patterns tool provides a simple way to record what you are noticing and identify possible triggers and influences.